Men Just Love to Be Touched

There is no doubt in my mind that the adage “women have a higher threshold of pain than men” is correct, childbirth makes this necessary but I would go on to say that it appears to me that men have a “lower threshold of pleasure than women”. I have to date given over 5,000 sensual massages to men and some 200 to women and  I can confidently say that in my experinece in the arousal stakes male bodies generally react and arouse faster to touch than female bodies.

With the male body I find that it is usualy after only 5 to 10 minutes into the massage and hear often see the clear evidence of arousal. Gentle moans or movements of the body and of course a developing erection is a clear sign and as the massage unfolds so the man will become even more aroused and reactive. These bodily reactions to my touch are immediate, when I stroke his back, scratch my nails on his bum or inner thighs or even simply massage his scalp, all of this will make him spontaneously respond with pleasurable sounds or movement. But I believe that there is far more to this than just sexual arousal. It is clear to me that as the massage unfolds and as my touch stimulates the skins sensory nerve endings, triggering the Pituitary gland to release Oxytocin, the hormone cutely called by some,  “the love hormone” so the man experiences arousal and erection is usually the result. What I have also noticed is that arousal takes place so manifests his need to create and intimate connection with me.  This may simply be a hand touching my thigh, arm or body or somwhere even more intimate. So I figure that similar in relevance to nature programming pain thresholds to be higher for women to be able to endure childbirth,  that this need and desire in men for intimate (reciprocal) touch is also been programmed in to the male physiology and psychology for a similar reason.  No,  his hand reaching out to touch me should not be viewed simply as a predatory sexual approach but more a genuine desire for connection and to receive approval and acceptance from another.  Most men know that to become completely and fully aroused most need to feel conected entitled and wanted of by the other person be it female or male.  Having his own touch welcomed and acknowledged and then reciprocated, particularly when received and given to sensitive and genital areas (the scrotum, perineum, anus) a man unconsciously  feels he can trust and feel safe and it is this feeling of safety that triggers his nervous system slide from the fight or flight mode to the rest and relax mode thus removing anxiety, allowing total relaxation of the muscles and mond and consequently give him maximum arousal. My expereinece, when giving male-to-male massage is that it this dynamic of intimate conection between men that is as pleasurable as the arousal and eventual orgasm itself. Conversely when I give sensual massage to female clinets after an initila quite period I find many women explode in to an almost sexual abandonment where they let go completely to the erotic nature of the massage. For example in the male to male massage the effect of cupping and gently stroking his balls and scrotum produces in the receiver not an erotic response but more a bonding, caring almost paternal emotion.Tritely I often say that to test my thoery about what men really want,  I should stand in Trafalgar Square with a sign offering all the men there two options a)  the option of having either a 5 minute fuck or b) to enjoy a 90 minute full body sensual massage that would of course include and orgasm by hand but not include any penetraticeve sex. I truely belive  that the majotity of men, certainly those over the age of 25, would opt for option B!Demure Debutante to Erotic The The Female Time BombWhen I give a sensual massage to a female client the dynamic of the massage is quite diferent. Initially the response to my touch is much slower and more sedate, very little display of movement or sound in fact the female who does immediately displas any response is the exception. However after about 30 minutes that I begin to see quite quickly the effects of my touch maybe some movement and moans. But when i start the more erotic touch genital stimulation that in when I see and feel what I call the female “Flip” as the demure deb explodes in to the erotic animal. light sisghs become groans of pleasure, gentle movements becomes tharshing and straining of limbs and gentle intimate touch to me become grabbing and pulling as her enegry and attention become rooted in her erotic journey.   Again this is proof of the effect of the Oxytocin at work still causing an initial arousal process but when released into the female body it creates at first a tempered effect ,a kind of wariness a “I like what you are doing but let me check you out first” feeling, it is only when this passes and  when touch has been assesed and accepted that the decorum deserts, reticence rolls away and is replaced by a full on primal sexual reaction.

Don’t let it ever be said that women are less sexual than men. If you believe it is men who hold the erotic trump card you will be wrong. It has to be said that after giving some 200 sensual massages to women, I am still in awe of this experience. Beware guys todays female is changing fast, no longer is it the pergiative of men to be the sexual overseer and its not just the young nubile female of the 21st centruary that is taking control and expressing her deeper desires but in my expereinec its the 35 yrs plus ladies that are the power houses of sexual energy. Like a time bomb ready once the female who has beene historically supressed by cultural, religious or simply social controls, lets these fall away what is revealed is her womanhood in its true glory. But this is not new, only our times and understand has changed. 100 years ago and more durig the Victorain era in particular female sexual desire was just a apparant. The women on the 1850’s felt no less sexuel desire as a woman of today, but today we understand that for her arousal, orgasm and sexual satisfaction is an essentail part of being a female human being. It is not a sign of mental disorder, it is not an indication of beeing morally corrupt or sacreligeous. It is a simply sign of being a woman and men should embrace and encorage this without question and both enjoy the results.

So go for it girls, reclaim your sexual territory but remember let the men enjoy men being the intimate animals for a while. Given them some tenderness, caress stroke and care for them and then in return they will give you back all you want in bundles (as long as you show them you want it).

Written by Colin Richards www.massage33.com / www.intimacymatters.co.uk